09.15.2000

One year and eleven days

On September 4, Jason and I celebrated one year officially together.

Last year, September 4th was a Saturday, I was visiting from Phoenix, and we were dancing at Universe. Late in the evening, Jason put his arms around me. All he said was "You work for me, John Logan."

We kissed, talked, danced. I said something like "Are we making this official, then?"

After that, it was done. The only thing left to decide was which one of us was moving and when. If you're keeping score, it turned out that we both moved, eventually.

A year doesn't ordinarily seem like that big of a milestone to me. But I've only reached it twice before, and never with someone I was living with. The passing of this year marks a period where I am almost completely satisfied with most facets of my life. Sure, I can see areas that I want to improve. But overall, I'm content. Happy even.

[Oy. Such a sappy entry. Forgive my self indulgence.]

So why is this working for us? What are we doing right? I don't know, but here are some thoughts....

"The passing of this year marks a period where I am almost completely satisfied with most facets of my life... I'm content. Happy even."

Jason and I are both only children. I've never dated another only child. From the very beginning, Jason and I shared a lot of common traits and quirks. We're both fairly solitary, independant people. Personal time becomes precious. We both felt as if we had to grow up faster than most, and we feel older than our birth certificate indicate. (This feeling is lessening somewhat for me. Paradoxically, I'm feeling more like a kid lately. Perhaps I'm just acting like one?)

Jason and I both like to dance, party, go clubbing. On the surface, that sounds like a ridiculous thing to worry about. However, it's amazing how polarizing the dance floor can be—along with all its peripheral distractions....

It's trite to say so, but we are also very open with one another. We try to communicate how we feel, and tell each other when things bother us. I haven't stayed angry at Jason for more than a brief period. When something comes up, we talk about it. Occasionally one of will "leave" for a while—take some private time to think or make decisions. But we actively seek compromise, and try to understand the other's point of view.

Many people may not understand a certain aspect of our relationship. Fidelity isn't an issue for us. Our relationship is open. Neither of us are terribly jealous men, and we recognize that we like to play, go to sleazy bars, dance parties. Jason calls it our "dark side." We have quite a lot of fun together playing on the dark side.

I think the common ground we have on this point is key to why things work so well. It's nice to be able to put aside an entire set of potential conflicts. We haven't defined rules, but we always make one thing certain: no matter where we play or what we do, at the end of the day/night/weekend/whatever, we go home together. (In some cases, all of us go home together!) It's working, and I have no complaints.

Re-reading this, it's apparent that Jason and I are perfect for each other mainly because we are sensitive, sleazy disco bunnies. (I'm simplifying....) But whatever we are, it works for me. Jason works for me.

Note to the Boo: Happy Anniversary to the best Boo I could ever want. I love the rings. And I love you. [Rings! We're officially living in sodomy! Whoohoo!]